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#1 
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Posted 26 January 2022 - 11:27 PM
So my mother was talking about how hard it was to live as a teen in the 80s. She said that almost literally every teen girl had anorexia or bulimia. She complains about how hard it was to live in the 80s compared to now. She also says that she wasn’t socially allowed to dye her hair, wear unique clothes, or do anything against the norm. Is this true? Personally I think that it is difficult growing up in a pandemic. So many people are still anorexic but just don’t share as much. My mom seems oblivious to what is going on in the teen world right now. In your opinion was growing up in the 80s as hard as she says? Im not looking for validation about how hard it is to grow up in the 2010s/2020s, I’m just genuinely curious.
#2
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Posted Yesterday, 01:11 AM
truthful basis to it, but it depends on what situation we're talking about. I think it might be true however that being too different was frowned upon. God forbid if you happened to be LGTB or too strange. I was a teenager in the mid to late 00's, and I think that was the first time when A LOT of young people were openly expressing themselves with style etc.
There's actually a lot of studies about young people having so much more pressure on them these days than in the past. Certainly social media is one thing but society has changed to be so much more demanding. My parent's generation and the one before them (boomers) tend to think that to get a job you basically just need to walk into wherever and state "I want to work here" to get a job and then you get to keep your job for life. At least in most western countries this is so far from the truth. Most young people are working while studying and still not making ends meet, people take illegal drugs to deal with all of it.
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#3
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Posted Yesterday, 01:15 AM
Would your mom lie about her experiences for some reason? Even if someone said growing up during the 80s wasn't hard for them how would that dispute your mom saying it was hard for her? Just like how you're saying it's hard growing up during the pandemic and a lot of people are anorexic now too, which is true. Especially during the pandemic EDs have risen a lot. But what if someone said "Well things weren't that bad for me" would that make what you're saying less valid?
Also it's kinda expected that she'd be oblivious since she's not a teen anymore.. just like anyone would be oblivious to something they haven't experienced. If someone wants to understand they can listen and empathize. Unless she's trying to downplay your experience by saying how she had it worse. And being purposely oblivious.
#4
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Posted Yesterday, 01:32 AM
Well, yes! Not harder at all, but as anorexic/bulimic? Yes. An again no.
I was born 84, I was diagnosed first time in 94 with anorexia at the age of nine. Back then everyone in the public eye, from Lady Di to Paris Hilton was THIN. It was not the healthy-bmi-fit-thin stuff like it is nowadays, but BMI 16 was normal for celebrities and if you had a bigger body (big=everything from 18 up to..., 23 was overweight, 25 one considered you as obese) you really suffered a lot and you were also bullied.
I always was skinny but I remember that I once asked a girl at school why she eats bread instead of a tomato because I thought she was too big. She was average, healthy. I am really sorry for that. I remember that my moms breakfast always was an iceberg lettuce wrap (no dressing) with some tomato.
Back then no-one cared about mental health, depression, anxiety, abusive homes, violent parents. But also everyone agreed that it is healthy to fast for two days a week, I even remember that our rottweiler (dog) was starved one day a week for health reasons.
I don´t miss the old times, you suffered a lot when you were not in a perfect body. Nowadays we care more about emotions, mental health, about psychology. If you opened up about bulimia you were weak and your "hobby" was expensive. If you opened up about anorexia, you wanted to look like a model. No one ever cared about mental problems. Abuse. Violence. No one offered help. It was another time, another life style.
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HW: 69 kgs - 152 lbs
after I tried recovery with the help of medication, and I really, really tried
LW 1: 38 kgs - 84 lbs
as a minor
LW 2: 42 kgs - 92 lbs
as an adult
GW: 47 kgs - 103 lbs
Height: 166 cm - 5.4 feet
- AN-R diagnosed at the age of 9
- AN-b/p diagnosed at the age of 13
- since then a mix of AN and B
- 37, mom of two, healthy BMI
- I suffer, I am not on a diet!
#5
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Posted Yesterday, 03:05 AM
Orio, on 27 Jan 2022 - 01:32 AM, said:
Well, yes! Not harder at all, but as anorexic/bulimic? Yes. An again no.
I was born 84, I was diagnosed first time in 94 with anorexia at the age of nine. Back then everyone in the public eye, from Lady Di to Paris Hilton was THIN. It was not the healthy-bmi-fit-thin stuff like it is nowadays, but BMI 16 was normal for celebrities and if you had a bigger body (big=everything from 18 up to..., 23 was overweight, 25 one considered you as obese) you really suffered a lot and you were also bullied.
I always was skinny but I remember that I once asked a girl at school why she eats bread instead of a tomato because I thought she was too big. She was average, healthy. I am really sorry for that. I remember that my moms breakfast always was an iceberg lettuce wrap (no dressing) with some tomato.
Back then no-one cared about mental health, depression, anxiety, abusive homes, violent parents. But also everyone agreed that it is healthy to fast for two days a week, I even remember that our rottweiler (dog) was starved one day a week for health reasons.
I don´t miss the old times, you suffered a lot when you were not in a perfect body. Nowadays we care more about emotions, mental health, about psychology. If you opened up about bulimia you were weak and your "hobby" was expensive. If you opened up about anorexia, you wanted to look like a model. No one ever cared about mental problems. Abuse. Violence. No one offered help. It was another time, another life style.
Nothing to add here, that’s exactly how I experienced it.
Oh god…those super low rise jeans and the heroine chic 😓 yes, I do think Gen Z is lucky compared to us 80s / 90s kids. And that’s a good thing.
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#6
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Posted Yesterday, 03:44 AM
Vividandpure, on 27 Jan 2022 - 03:05 AM, said:
Nothing to add here, that’s exactly how I experienced it.
Oh god…those super low rise jeans and the heroine chic yes, I do think Gen Z is lucky compared to us 80s / 90s kids. And that’s a good thing.
And we had no instagram and were able to fake pictures to look skinnier.
Seriously, nowadays it´s way more comfortable to starve.
Back then: I WAS HUNGRY, all the fucking time.
Now: Miracle pasta, skinny syrup, zero cal ranch and calories are tracked down everywhere. You can easily prepare a whole meal under 100 calories and feel okay and fuel.
Back then I actually tried the OJ cotton balls and we backed "bread" with wooden chips soaked in water. And we ate it!
There was not psyllium husk or konjac powder - you ate dirt and bullshit or you suffered even more than you already did.
That´s maybe why I always say that I am not on a diet! It´s a mental illness, that is visible. Or not.
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HW: 69 kgs - 152 lbs
after I tried recovery with the help of medication, and I really, really tried
LW 1: 38 kgs - 84 lbs
as a minor
LW 2: 42 kgs - 92 lbs
as an adult
GW: 47 kgs - 103 lbs
Height: 166 cm - 5.4 feet
- AN-R diagnosed at the age of 9
- AN-b/p diagnosed at the age of 13
- since then a mix of AN and B
- 37, mom of two, healthy BMI
- I suffer, I am not on a diet!
#7
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Posted Yesterday, 03:47 AM
Nowadays you can get information and support with a click of a button almost (yes it might be expensive in the US) but there's easier to build a good and stable support network.
So I think there might be some truth behind her statement, but it also sucks today and a lot of people are still misinformed and ignorant to the different disorders.
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#8
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Posted Yesterday, 03:48 AM
I think if you've got a mental illness and problems in your life they're going to be hard no matter what time period it is. I grew up in the 90s during the peak "heroin chic, everyone must be rail thin" fashion period but i don't think it was any hardder or less hard than it is for people growing up now. just different. i think everyone should have a bit more empathy for each other and older people like me shouldn't be so obsessed with trying to tell younger people how "easy" they have it, it annoys me so much.
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#9
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Posted Yesterday, 03:57 AM
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#10
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Posted Yesterday, 04:47 AM
This has been going on forever. The older generation always feels they had it harder and the younger generation always thinks that they do. It's not a new development. I wasn't around but I'd say that probably some things were harder and some easier.
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Posted Yesterday, 11:20 PM
coffeehuedoll, on 27 Jan 2022 - 01:15 AM, said:
Would your mom lie about her experiences for some reason? Even if someone said growing up during the 80s wasn't hard for them how would that dispute your mom saying it was hard for her? Just like how you're saying it's hard growing up during the pandemic and a lot of people are anorexic now too, which is true. Especially during the pandemic EDs have risen a lot. But what if someone said "Well things weren't that bad for me" would that make what you're saying less valid?
Also it's kinda expected that she'd be oblivious since she's not a teen anymore.. just like anyone would be oblivious to something they haven't experienced. If someone wants to understand they can listen and empathize. Unless she's trying to downplay your experience by saying how she had it worse. And being purposely oblivious.
She is mostly honest but I do think that she thinks that I’m anorexic and that she is shamming me without saying it directly.
#12
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Posted Today, 08:13 AM
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Posted Today, 08:28 AM
Orio, on 27 Jan 2022 - 03:44 AM, said:
And we had no instagram and were able to fake pictures to look skinnier.
Seriously, nowadays it´s way more comfortable to starve.
Back then: I WAS HUNGRY, all the fucking time.
Now: Miracle pasta, skinny syrup, zero cal ranch and calories are tracked down everywhere. You can easily prepare a whole meal under 100 calories and feel okay and fuel.
Back then I actually tried the OJ cotton balls and we backed "bread" with wooden chips soaked in water. And we ate it!
There was not psyllium husk or konjac powder - you ate dirt and bullshit or you suffered even more than you already did.
That´s maybe why I always say that I am not on a diet! It´s a mental illness, that is visible. Or not.
Okay so I didn't live in the 80s or even 90s, but I have to say this is exactly what I've been thinking occasionally. Sometimes I just think how shit I'd be at starving if I didn't have all the modern day distractions and access to all kinds of low calorie stuff & supplements. Then again... I don't know if that's for better or for worse in the grand scheme of things lol.
#14
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Posted Today, 09:00 AM
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