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Posted Yesterday, 05:16 PM
TheHollowBones, on 24 Jan 2022 - 3:17 PM, said:
Thank you! And yeah giiiirl I used to be married to a Mexican man and his mom made the BEST enchiladas I have ever had so I know exactly what you mean. When I started restricting again I almost DIED when I logged it into MyFitnessPal and saw the whole plate of 6 enchiladas was over 2,000 calories! She made me feel so guilty when I told her no, thank you and I wasn't hungry LOL
I'm so excited to hopefully lose enough to be able to wear shorts by the summertime again! Do you think you're gonna make it down to 100 without your mom freaking out? I live on my own so luckily nobody to really tell me to stop, but I do have a boyfriend now obviously and sometimes he comments on how I'm not eating enough. It's hard sometimes coming up with lies to tell them to make them think nothing is going through your brain (like yeeeeeah but I just ate 600 calories for breakfast so no). I'm trying to go with higher restriction this time around, last time low restriction made me feel so weak and I have a really physical job, so KUDOS to you for being able to do low restriction! It's easier when you're sedentary and I WISH I could be like that!
Oh my goodness… enchiladas are so good, I’m extremely happy we don’t make them at home more than once a year! Lol
Getting down to 112~116 already freaked her out in the past so I can’t feasibly see me getting to 100 without it being extremely slow (high restriction) to get her worries off my back. Last month she force fed me a taquito with birria meat and made sure I ate it because she was concerned I wasn’t eating enough. Not the best way to approach an ED but okay mom.
One of the things I can bring up when I do get down there is how she brags about being 103 lbs at my age (we’re the same height). If she can be that skinny then why can’t I? Although I do recognize the approach is different; I’m literally starving myself whether I think so or not.
The lies make me feel so bad. Throwing away food so it looks like I ate. I would put food in a zip lock bag for me to toss it in a trash bin when I get to my university campus, and say I ate. It’s such a waste, and it’s not like I’m well off or anything so the guilt is even more present. Hell, I stuffed the left overs of my birthday cake down the drain and felt so bad. I hate it.
I want to be skinny already, eat my maintainable calories, and not have to lie anymore 
but eating volume like salads and all has really helped with the suspicions.
Sorry if I’ve overshared!! And please don’t worry about the triple post! This website gets wacky on me too haha.
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Posted Today, 12:49 PM
fαye, on 24 Jan 2022 - 5:16 PM, said:
Oh my goodness… enchiladas are so good, I’m extremely happy we don’t make them at home more than once a year! Lol
Getting down to 112~116 already freaked her out in the past so I can’t feasibly see me getting to 100 without it being extremely slow (high restriction) to get her worries off my back. Last month she force fed me a taquito with birria meat and made sure I ate it because she was concerned I wasn’t eating enough. Not the best way to approach an ED but okay mom.
One of the things I can bring up when I do get down there is how she brags about being 103 lbs at my age (we’re the same height). If she can be that skinny then why can’t I? Although I do recognize the approach is different; I’m literally starving myself whether I think so or not.
The lies make me feel so bad. Throwing away food so it looks like I ate. I would put food in a zip lock bag for me to toss it in a trash bin when I get to my university campus, and say I ate. It’s such a waste, and it’s not like I’m well off or anything so the guilt is even more present. Hell, I stuffed the left overs of my birthday cake down the drain and felt so bad. I hate it.
I want to be skinny already, eat my maintainable calories, and not have to lie anymore
but eating volume like salads and all has really helped with the suspicions.
Sorry if I’ve overshared!! And please don’t worry about the triple post! This website gets wacky on me too haha.
Oh yeah I would definitely get defensive then when you hit your LW again with your mom. Force-feeding is so weird. Like what is she so worried about? Maybe she also is jealous of your sister if she's bigger now herself (with aging of course that's probable). And if you're bigger than your mom too then maybe SHE is the one who doesn't want you to lose weight so you don't get smaller than her too! Honestly who knows, people are so weird sometimes.
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