mpa and others

elly_x

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Posted 21 January 2022 - 12:02 PM

fml. my mom made angel food cake with macerated strawberries and cool whip. i was doing fine all day, except i slept in past the time i usually have "breakfast" (just an apple) so i told myself i'd just not eat it that day.

then, after everyone went to bed it's like i became a zombie and just. shoveled anything and everything into my face.

i had one slice of cake + strawbs + cool whip. then i went and purged. and then i went back and had another slice of cake + accoutrements. one bowl of chocolate ice cream. half a bag of chips and honestly idr what else, it's like i blacked out mid-binge.

anyway... i weighed myself as i do every morning, and i went up from 137.7 to 142.1!!! ;A;

i know it's just water weight, as i'm still losing fat (yesterday's reading was 35.1% body fat, today was 34.5%, and it's steadily going down every day) but... holy moley was that a huge blow to my self worth. i'm considering switching to weighing myself weekly instead of daily, so i don't have to go through this disappointment every morning, but the idea of not checking if i'm on track every day is also scary, so idk what to do. i'll just go back to restricting and stay away from the kitchen as much as possible for now i guess :')

sooo, yeah. thanks for letting me vent. i'm open to suggestions if anyone has any. i hope y'all are having a good day c: