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Posted Yesterday, 08:23 AM
11:19am: i did not b/p yesterday. first time in god knows how ling that i had a day free of it. ate a little its just hard its my meds but atleast no binge and no purge
i am taking alot of lax to try to feel better about it
i shit myself yesterday from it :/ but i have an assessment for trewatment on thursday
weight was 92.4 +.4 well.. idk. i guess thats fine considering the amount i kept down and no purge so im more hydrated
im gonna take like 3 more lax i just have to do something im gonna try not to b/p again but i feel like i ate too much yesterday hopefully i can eat less today just so my head feels better
i slept with my mom last noght (that sounds weird lol) no but just in the same bed so i would be less likely to b/p and i basically clung to her side whole time she was home i know its probably annoying but if i am left alone i just cant stop so i just tried to stay w someone cause i dont want to purge and hopefully i can make it through today
11:25am: weighed again after i peed a bit and am 92.0 so i maintained but keep 92.4 as what is it for today
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#85 
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Posted Yesterday, 09:57 AM
Hi.
My daughter is your age. I have the ED, she does not, but I am reading this as a mother. I see you as a child and I just want to hug you and let you cry awhile. I'm irritated that your mom had you leave the other night, but the part about you clinging to her so you would not B/P is so heartbreaking - but a GOOD idea.
What started this? Do you know? I see you were once heavy and now underweight and hurting your body ... what was the catalyst in all this? If you don't want to answer, that is perfectly fine. But that may be a good starting point to finding out how to find solace in allowing yourself to retain needed nutrients.
I hurt for you. You are NOT alone, ever. I wish I could give you a hug, we all care. You deserve a nourished body and you deserve to live.
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#86
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Posted Yesterday, 10:10 AM
embrock, on 28 Dec 2021 - 09:57 AM, said:
this just made me cry. thank you. i think it was a good idea too. im gonna do it again tonight.Hi.
My daughter is your age. I have the ED, she does not, but I am reading this as a mother. I see you as a child and I just want to hug you and let you cry awhile. I'm irritated that your mom had you leave the other night, but the part about you clinging to her so you would not B/P is so heartbreaking - but a GOOD idea.
What started this? Do you know? I see you were once heavy and now underweight and hurting your body ... what was the catalyst in all this? If you don't want to answer, that is perfectly fine. But that may be a good starting point to finding out how to find solace in allowing yourself to retain needed nutrients.
I hurt for you. You are NOT alone, ever. I wish I could give you a hug, we all care. You deserve a nourished body and you deserve to live.
i dont know what started this. i was first in hospital with anorexia at 12 and always binge ate before that ): its just constantly been something for the past 6 years, but as a child i overate and was obese so i dont even know how to maintain a normal weight or eat correctly. i dont know what triggered more dangerous behaviors though but you are right i may need to really dig deep and try to find out.
thank you. i appreciate the support so much.
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